FUN STUFF -- funny jokes or movies sent to us by our friends!!
PHILOSOPHY BY DOG - from Bill S -- he and his wife are "mom &
dad" to 7 cats! :O)
The reason a dog has so many friends is that he wags his tail instead of his tongue. -Anonymous.
Don't accept your dog's admiration as conclusive evidence that you are wonderful. -Ann Landers.
If there are no dogs in Heaven, then when I die I want to go where they went. -Will Rogers.
There is no psychiatrist in the world like a puppy licking your face. -Ben Williams.
A dog is the only thing on earth that loves you more than he loves himself. -Josh Billings.
The average dog is a nicer person than the average person. -Andy Rooney.
We give dogs time we can spare, space we can spare and love we can spare. And in return, dogs give us their all. It's the best
deal man has ever made.
-M. Acklam.
Dogs love their friends and bite their enemies, quite unlike people, who are incapable of pure love and always have to mix love
and hate. -Sigmund Freud.
I wonder if other dogs think poodles are members of a weird religious cult. -Rita Rudner.
A dog teaches a boy fidelity, perseverance, and to turn around three times before lying down. -Robert Benchley.
Anybody who doesn't know what soap tastes like never washed a dog. -Franklin P. Jones.
If I have any beliefs about immortality, it is that certain dogs I have known will go to heaven, and very, very few persons. -James
Thurber.
If your dog is fat, you aren't getting enough exercise. -Unknown.
My dog is worried about the economy because Alpo is up to $3.00 a can. That's almost $21.00 in dog money. -Joe Weinstein.
Ever consider what our dogs must think of us? I mean, here we come from a grocery with the most amazing haul, chicken,
pork, half a cow. They must
think we're the greatest hunters on earth! -Anne Tyler
Women and cats will do as they please, and men and dogs should relax and get used to the idea.
-Robert A. Heinlein.
If you pick up a starving dog and make him prosperous, he will not bite you; that is the principal difference between a dog and a
man. -Mark Twain.
You can say any foolish thing to a dog, and the dog will give you a look that says, 'Wow, you're right! I never would've thought of
that!' -Dave Barry.
Dogs are not our whole life, but they make our lives whole. -Roger Caras.
If you think dogs can't count, try putting three dog biscuits in your pocket and then give him only two of them. -Phil Pastoret.
My goal in life is to be as good a person as my dog thinks I am. -Anonymous
DOG & CAT DIARIES -- i love this one -- from Jennifer L, Molly's mom!
DOG DIARY
8:00 am - Dog food! My favorite!
9:30 am - A car ride! My favorite!
9:40 am - A walk in the park! My favorite!
10:30 am - Got rubbed and petted! My favorite!
11:00 am - Went to the vet. Bummer.
12:00 pm - Lunch! My favorite!
1:00 pm - Played in the yard! My favorite!
5:00 pm - Milk bones! My favorite!
7:00 pm - Got to play ball! My favorite!
8:00 pm - Wow! Watched TV with the people! My favorite!
11:00 pm - Sleeping on the bed! My favorite!
CAT DIARY
Day 983 of my captivity.
My captors continue to taunt me with bizarre little dangling objects. They dine lavishly on fresh meat, while the other
inmates and I are fed hash or some sort of dry nuggets.
Although I make my contempt for the rations perfectly clear, I nevertheless must eat something in order to keep up
my strength. The only thing that keeps me going is my dream of escape. In an attempt to disgust them, I once again
vomit on the carpet.
Today I decapitated a mouse and dropped its headless body at their feet. I had hoped this would strike fear into their
hearts, since it clearly demonstrates what I am capable of. However, they merely made condescending comments
about what a 'good little hunter' I am.
Bastards!
There was some sort of assembly of their accomplices tonight. I was placed in solitary confinement for the duration
of the event. However, I could hear the noises and smell the food. I overheard that my confinement was due to the
power of 'allergies.' I must learn what this means, and how to use it to my advantage.
Today I was almost successful in an attempt to assassinate one of my tormentors by weaving around his feet as he
was walking. I must try this again tomorrow - but at the top of the stairs.
I am convinced that the other prisoners here are flunkies and snitches. The dog receives special privileges. He is
regularly released - and seems to be more than willing to return. He is obviously retarded.
The bird has got to be an informant. I observe him communicate with the guards regularly. I am certain that he
reports my every move. My captors have arranged protective custody for him in an elevated cell, so he is safe -- For
now.